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Blood Water Paint

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"Haunting ... teems with raw emotion, and McCullough deftly captures the experience of learning to behave in a male-driven society and then breaking outside of it."—The New Yorker 

"I will be haunted and empowered by Artemisia Gentileschi's story for the rest of my life."—Amanda Lovelace, bestselling author of the princess saves herself in this one


A William C. Morris Debut Award Finalist
2018 National Book Award Longlist

Her mother died when she was twelve, and suddenly Artemisia Gentileschi had a stark choice: a life as a nun in a convent or a life grinding pigment for her father's paint.

She chose paint.

By the time she was seventeen, Artemisia did more than grind pigment. She was one of Rome's most talented painters, even if no one knew her name. But Rome in 1610 was a city where men took what they wanted from women, and in the aftermath of rape Artemisia faced another terrible choice: a life of silence or a life of truth, no matter the cost.

He will not consume
my every thought.
I am a painter.
I will paint.

Joy McCullough's bold novel in verse is a portrait of an artist as a young woman, filled with the soaring highs of creative inspiration and the devastating setbacks of a system built to break her. McCullough weaves Artemisia's heartbreaking story with the stories of the ancient heroines, Susanna and Judith, who become not only the subjects of two of Artemisia's most famous paintings but sources of strength as she battles to paint a woman's timeless truth in the face of unspeakable and all-too-familiar violence.

I will show you
what a woman can do.

★"A captivating and impressive."—Booklist, starred review
★"Belongs on every YA shelf."—SLJ, starred review
★"Haunting."—Publishers Weekly, starred review 
★"Luminous."—Shelf Awareness, starred review
© John Ulman
Joy McCullough is a playwright and the New York Times bestselling author of several books for children and young adults, including Blood Water Paint, which was longlisted for the National Book Award and was a finalist for the William C. Morris Award. She studied theater at Northwestern Univer­sity, fell in love with her husband atop a Guatemalan volcano, and writes books and plays from her home in the Seattle area. View titles by Joy McCullough
11.

 
Once upon a time
I was a child,
not the woman
of the house.
 
Not so long ago
but long enough
the days of tugging
on my mother’s skirts
in hopes of being lifted up
at every whim
are hazy round the edges,
like a shadow bleeding
into light.
 
It’s hazy how,
her belly round
with brothers,
Mother still made room
for me to crawl
up on her lap
to hear a story
no one else would tell.
 
How she’d look down 
and ask me what I thought
of Father’s paintings,
listen to my answer.
 
It’s hazy how
she made my father
laugh.
How when I’d startle
in the night she’d soothe me
with a tune
to chase away
the monsters.
 
It’s hazy how
her last few weeks,
confined to bed,
the child inside
a greater weight
than those who came before,
and even when the child arrived
 
                a sister, finally, cold and blue,
 
and fever dreams bled
into pain laced with delirium,
Prudentia Montone spent
the last of her strength
to burn into my mind
the tales of women
no one else would
think to tell.
 
Those stories
of a righteous woman,
her virtue questioned
through no fault of her own;
of a widow
with nothing left to lose . . .
No way to tell
where shadow ends
and light begins
 
but Mother was always
                                                the light.
 
 
12.
 
Light dances on the child’s curls
and whether Father sees
or not
the bond between the baby
and his mother is
perfection.
 
Twelve years
with my mother
were not enough
but I know how to paint the love,
the source of light.
 
The final touches that remain
would go unnoticed to an unskilled eye.
In truth, I could release her now.
A signature the final touch,
 
                Orazio Gentileschi,
                (never Artemisia)
 
the client would be satisfied,
and none would be the wiser.
 
But I would know
her arm is
                                not quite right.
It wraps around the baby,
yet still looks flat.
 
Father babbled out
some useless nonsense
when I tried to ask him
how to fix the problem.
I don’t think
he understood
my question.
If he cannot see
the problem to begin with,
how could he ever solve it?
 
It’s only a commission,
doesn’t even bear my name.
But I’m not only painting the Madonna.
I’m building a ladder,
each new technique,
a rung.

13.
 
Every time my father shoos me
down the stairs
away from my studio,
each time he speaks to buyers
                as though I am not there,
each time they leer at me
                as I descend in seething fury,
my mother’s stories
stoke the flames inside.
 
We mostly deal in Bible tales,
some portraits, ancient histories, myths.
But all the maestros
sign their names
to David, Adam, Moses.
Those who follow strive
to leave their mark as well.
 
I can paint a David—king or upstart boy,
but when I do
there’s nothing of me
on the canvas.
Susanna, though, is different.
 
My mother never held a brush
but still composed
the boldest images
from the brightest colors
drawing the eye—the mind—
to what mattered most:
 
                the young woman
                stealing a moment
                of peace to wash
                away the day
 
                                then her world,
                                stained beyond repair.
 
Susanna and the Elders.
 
Father’s made attempts at Susanna,
just like the other painters—men—
who think they have the right
to tell the story of a woman
always watched.
 
But one can’t truly tell a story
unless they’ve lived it in their heart.
 
The longer I’m shuffled
in and out of the studio,
used for what I can offer,
not what I long to share,
the more certain I am
I can do Susanna justice.
I can do my mother justice.
 
I can have justice.
 
But I’m holding back
until I think
perhaps
my skills
can match
my heart.
 
 
14.
 
My arm cradles my palette,
rounded, three-dimensional.
 
I paint alla prima in my mind
exactly how it should look.
 
Why then can I not transpose
                the image in my mind
                the image of my flesh
onto the canvas?
 
I stare at the Madonna’s
flat, flat arm so long
my eyes begin to blur.
I do not notice
the creak of stairs
                moan of door
                                steps that cross
                                                the studio.
 
Or perhaps he does not enter
like a mortal man
but appears
fully formed
a miraculous apparition.
 
Then:
                                a breath
                                upon my cheek.
 
Not Father’s breath.
I grope for hiked-up skirts,
fling endless, heavy layers
of propriety
toward my ankles.
I am a model Roman girl
(or I can play the part at least).
 
The man averts his eyes,
steps back to give me space,
as though he doesn’t realize
his mere presence in this room
drives out all air.
He may as well
be pressed against me.
 
He did not mean to startle—
that much is clear.
And even now as I
                                recover
                                steady my breath
                                check my skirts once more
his eyes are not on me
but on the canvas.
 
                                               My name is Agostino Tassi.
                                               And you are Artemisia.

Discussion Guide for Blood Water Paint

Provides questions, discussion topics, suggested reading lists, introductions and/or author Q&As, which are intended to enhance reading groups’ experiences.

(Please note: the guide displayed here is the most recently uploaded version; while unlikely, any page citation discrepancies between the guide and book is likely due to pagination differences between a book’s different formats.)

"Haunting ... [Blood Water Paint] does not read like historical fiction. It teems with raw emotion, and McCullough deftly captures the experience of learning to behave in a male-driven society and then breaking outside of it."—The New Yorker 

"An impassioned, lushly described account of a young woman who refuses to dwell in secret shame. Blood Water Paint fits smoothly into the current conversation surrounding the #MeToo movement."—Chicago Tribune

"Coming out of the novel, I knew I would be haunted and empowered by Artemisia’s story for the rest of my life."—Amanda Lovelace, bestselling author of the princess saves herself in this one

★"McCullough has managed to vividly capture a singularly brave, resilient feminist who became an icon during a time when women had almost no agency. Her story and the stunning verse through which it is told will resonate just as strongly with readers today. A captivating and impressive debut about a timeless heroine." —Booklist, starred review

★"McCullough’s beautifully crafted text will inspire upper-middle/high school readers to research the true story upon which this powerful piece of historical fiction is based. The poetry is clear and revelatory, exploring Artemisia’s passion for both art and life. The expression of her intense feelings is gripping and her complexity of character make her a force to be reckoned with, both in her times and in ours."—SLJ, starred review

★"A haunting, stirring depiction of an unforgettable woman, Artemisia's story will resonate deeply with readers today and beyond."—Publishers Weekly, starred review 

★"Luminous."—Shelf Awareness, starred review

"A visceral reminder that women have suffered and stood strong throughout time.”—Mindy McGinnis, award-winning author of The Female of the Species.

"Both a grave reminder of how little has changed and a hopeful testament to how much more we might achieve, McCullough's debut is a must read."—Gae Polisner, author of The Memory of Things 

"Blood Water Paint is a deftly layered portrait, at once intimate and universal."—Melanie Crowder, author of Audacity

"McCullough's stunning, immersive debut tells a timely story that's sure to stay with you long after you finish."—Buzzfeed

"Timeless and, alas, all too timely."—Kirkus

"[W]ill resonate with modern feminists."—BookPage

“McCullough’s debut novel is one of a kind. ... [A] truly inspiring and impactful story."—Romatic Times

"Filled with hope and an important message that women’s voices cannot be silenced."—Book Riot

"For lovers of writers like Laurie Halse Anderson and An Na."—Bustle

“A stunning portrait.” –Bitch 
 
“Can be inhaled in a day.” –Paste
 
“Deeply moving…”—Brit & Co

"This intensely passionate and powerful exploration of women’s lives, stories, truths, and power is a masterpiece." —Teen Librarian Toolbox

Amelia Bloomer Top Ten
Amelia Elizabeth Walden Award Finalist
Booklist
 Editor's Choice Top of the List
Boston Globe Best Books

Book Page Best of the Year
Bustle Best of the Year 
Chicago Public Library Best of the Best 
Cooperative Children’s Book Center Choices List
Globe and Mail 100: Favourite Books of the Year
National Book Award Longlist
Pacific Northwest Booksellers Association 2019 Book Award
A Publishers Weekly Flying Start
School Library Journal Best of the Year
Shelf Awareness Best Children's & Teen Books of the Year 
Texas Tayshas Reading List
YALSA Best Fiction for Young Adults
YALSA Teen's Top Ten Nominee
YALSA William C. Morris Award Finalist


About

"Haunting ... teems with raw emotion, and McCullough deftly captures the experience of learning to behave in a male-driven society and then breaking outside of it."—The New Yorker 

"I will be haunted and empowered by Artemisia Gentileschi's story for the rest of my life."—Amanda Lovelace, bestselling author of the princess saves herself in this one


A William C. Morris Debut Award Finalist
2018 National Book Award Longlist

Her mother died when she was twelve, and suddenly Artemisia Gentileschi had a stark choice: a life as a nun in a convent or a life grinding pigment for her father's paint.

She chose paint.

By the time she was seventeen, Artemisia did more than grind pigment. She was one of Rome's most talented painters, even if no one knew her name. But Rome in 1610 was a city where men took what they wanted from women, and in the aftermath of rape Artemisia faced another terrible choice: a life of silence or a life of truth, no matter the cost.

He will not consume
my every thought.
I am a painter.
I will paint.

Joy McCullough's bold novel in verse is a portrait of an artist as a young woman, filled with the soaring highs of creative inspiration and the devastating setbacks of a system built to break her. McCullough weaves Artemisia's heartbreaking story with the stories of the ancient heroines, Susanna and Judith, who become not only the subjects of two of Artemisia's most famous paintings but sources of strength as she battles to paint a woman's timeless truth in the face of unspeakable and all-too-familiar violence.

I will show you
what a woman can do.

★"A captivating and impressive."—Booklist, starred review
★"Belongs on every YA shelf."—SLJ, starred review
★"Haunting."—Publishers Weekly, starred review 
★"Luminous."—Shelf Awareness, starred review

Author

© John Ulman
Joy McCullough is a playwright and the New York Times bestselling author of several books for children and young adults, including Blood Water Paint, which was longlisted for the National Book Award and was a finalist for the William C. Morris Award. She studied theater at Northwestern Univer­sity, fell in love with her husband atop a Guatemalan volcano, and writes books and plays from her home in the Seattle area. View titles by Joy McCullough

Excerpt

11.

 
Once upon a time
I was a child,
not the woman
of the house.
 
Not so long ago
but long enough
the days of tugging
on my mother’s skirts
in hopes of being lifted up
at every whim
are hazy round the edges,
like a shadow bleeding
into light.
 
It’s hazy how,
her belly round
with brothers,
Mother still made room
for me to crawl
up on her lap
to hear a story
no one else would tell.
 
How she’d look down 
and ask me what I thought
of Father’s paintings,
listen to my answer.
 
It’s hazy how
she made my father
laugh.
How when I’d startle
in the night she’d soothe me
with a tune
to chase away
the monsters.
 
It’s hazy how
her last few weeks,
confined to bed,
the child inside
a greater weight
than those who came before,
and even when the child arrived
 
                a sister, finally, cold and blue,
 
and fever dreams bled
into pain laced with delirium,
Prudentia Montone spent
the last of her strength
to burn into my mind
the tales of women
no one else would
think to tell.
 
Those stories
of a righteous woman,
her virtue questioned
through no fault of her own;
of a widow
with nothing left to lose . . .
No way to tell
where shadow ends
and light begins
 
but Mother was always
                                                the light.
 
 
12.
 
Light dances on the child’s curls
and whether Father sees
or not
the bond between the baby
and his mother is
perfection.
 
Twelve years
with my mother
were not enough
but I know how to paint the love,
the source of light.
 
The final touches that remain
would go unnoticed to an unskilled eye.
In truth, I could release her now.
A signature the final touch,
 
                Orazio Gentileschi,
                (never Artemisia)
 
the client would be satisfied,
and none would be the wiser.
 
But I would know
her arm is
                                not quite right.
It wraps around the baby,
yet still looks flat.
 
Father babbled out
some useless nonsense
when I tried to ask him
how to fix the problem.
I don’t think
he understood
my question.
If he cannot see
the problem to begin with,
how could he ever solve it?
 
It’s only a commission,
doesn’t even bear my name.
But I’m not only painting the Madonna.
I’m building a ladder,
each new technique,
a rung.

13.
 
Every time my father shoos me
down the stairs
away from my studio,
each time he speaks to buyers
                as though I am not there,
each time they leer at me
                as I descend in seething fury,
my mother’s stories
stoke the flames inside.
 
We mostly deal in Bible tales,
some portraits, ancient histories, myths.
But all the maestros
sign their names
to David, Adam, Moses.
Those who follow strive
to leave their mark as well.
 
I can paint a David—king or upstart boy,
but when I do
there’s nothing of me
on the canvas.
Susanna, though, is different.
 
My mother never held a brush
but still composed
the boldest images
from the brightest colors
drawing the eye—the mind—
to what mattered most:
 
                the young woman
                stealing a moment
                of peace to wash
                away the day
 
                                then her world,
                                stained beyond repair.
 
Susanna and the Elders.
 
Father’s made attempts at Susanna,
just like the other painters—men—
who think they have the right
to tell the story of a woman
always watched.
 
But one can’t truly tell a story
unless they’ve lived it in their heart.
 
The longer I’m shuffled
in and out of the studio,
used for what I can offer,
not what I long to share,
the more certain I am
I can do Susanna justice.
I can do my mother justice.
 
I can have justice.
 
But I’m holding back
until I think
perhaps
my skills
can match
my heart.
 
 
14.
 
My arm cradles my palette,
rounded, three-dimensional.
 
I paint alla prima in my mind
exactly how it should look.
 
Why then can I not transpose
                the image in my mind
                the image of my flesh
onto the canvas?
 
I stare at the Madonna’s
flat, flat arm so long
my eyes begin to blur.
I do not notice
the creak of stairs
                moan of door
                                steps that cross
                                                the studio.
 
Or perhaps he does not enter
like a mortal man
but appears
fully formed
a miraculous apparition.
 
Then:
                                a breath
                                upon my cheek.
 
Not Father’s breath.
I grope for hiked-up skirts,
fling endless, heavy layers
of propriety
toward my ankles.
I am a model Roman girl
(or I can play the part at least).
 
The man averts his eyes,
steps back to give me space,
as though he doesn’t realize
his mere presence in this room
drives out all air.
He may as well
be pressed against me.
 
He did not mean to startle—
that much is clear.
And even now as I
                                recover
                                steady my breath
                                check my skirts once more
his eyes are not on me
but on the canvas.
 
                                               My name is Agostino Tassi.
                                               And you are Artemisia.

Guides

Discussion Guide for Blood Water Paint

Provides questions, discussion topics, suggested reading lists, introductions and/or author Q&As, which are intended to enhance reading groups’ experiences.

(Please note: the guide displayed here is the most recently uploaded version; while unlikely, any page citation discrepancies between the guide and book is likely due to pagination differences between a book’s different formats.)

Praise

"Haunting ... [Blood Water Paint] does not read like historical fiction. It teems with raw emotion, and McCullough deftly captures the experience of learning to behave in a male-driven society and then breaking outside of it."—The New Yorker 

"An impassioned, lushly described account of a young woman who refuses to dwell in secret shame. Blood Water Paint fits smoothly into the current conversation surrounding the #MeToo movement."—Chicago Tribune

"Coming out of the novel, I knew I would be haunted and empowered by Artemisia’s story for the rest of my life."—Amanda Lovelace, bestselling author of the princess saves herself in this one

★"McCullough has managed to vividly capture a singularly brave, resilient feminist who became an icon during a time when women had almost no agency. Her story and the stunning verse through which it is told will resonate just as strongly with readers today. A captivating and impressive debut about a timeless heroine." —Booklist, starred review

★"McCullough’s beautifully crafted text will inspire upper-middle/high school readers to research the true story upon which this powerful piece of historical fiction is based. The poetry is clear and revelatory, exploring Artemisia’s passion for both art and life. The expression of her intense feelings is gripping and her complexity of character make her a force to be reckoned with, both in her times and in ours."—SLJ, starred review

★"A haunting, stirring depiction of an unforgettable woman, Artemisia's story will resonate deeply with readers today and beyond."—Publishers Weekly, starred review 

★"Luminous."—Shelf Awareness, starred review

"A visceral reminder that women have suffered and stood strong throughout time.”—Mindy McGinnis, award-winning author of The Female of the Species.

"Both a grave reminder of how little has changed and a hopeful testament to how much more we might achieve, McCullough's debut is a must read."—Gae Polisner, author of The Memory of Things 

"Blood Water Paint is a deftly layered portrait, at once intimate and universal."—Melanie Crowder, author of Audacity

"McCullough's stunning, immersive debut tells a timely story that's sure to stay with you long after you finish."—Buzzfeed

"Timeless and, alas, all too timely."—Kirkus

"[W]ill resonate with modern feminists."—BookPage

“McCullough’s debut novel is one of a kind. ... [A] truly inspiring and impactful story."—Romatic Times

"Filled with hope and an important message that women’s voices cannot be silenced."—Book Riot

"For lovers of writers like Laurie Halse Anderson and An Na."—Bustle

“A stunning portrait.” –Bitch 
 
“Can be inhaled in a day.” –Paste
 
“Deeply moving…”—Brit & Co

"This intensely passionate and powerful exploration of women’s lives, stories, truths, and power is a masterpiece." —Teen Librarian Toolbox

Amelia Bloomer Top Ten
Amelia Elizabeth Walden Award Finalist
Booklist
 Editor's Choice Top of the List
Boston Globe Best Books

Book Page Best of the Year
Bustle Best of the Year 
Chicago Public Library Best of the Best 
Cooperative Children’s Book Center Choices List
Globe and Mail 100: Favourite Books of the Year
National Book Award Longlist
Pacific Northwest Booksellers Association 2019 Book Award
A Publishers Weekly Flying Start
School Library Journal Best of the Year
Shelf Awareness Best Children's & Teen Books of the Year 
Texas Tayshas Reading List
YALSA Best Fiction for Young Adults
YALSA Teen's Top Ten Nominee
YALSA William C. Morris Award Finalist


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